The first time I heard about the penis envy ,I was just curious what it meant and when curiosity got better of me ,a desire to know more became my persuit . Definitely in my mind , I wondered, how can I really fancy the way it is visible to see when men develop a bulge ,at this point my mind had run wild and I just laughed at my idiotic thought but is it really idiotic or it is what it is .
Sigmund Freud when doing psychological analysis regarding women psychosexual development, he came up with penis envy theory ,in which according to him young girls when growing up experience anxiety when they realize they do not have a penis. In his theory , he stated that , the penis envy stage begins when there is transition from an attachment to the mother to competition with the mother attention, recognition and affection of the father.While for boys, when they realize that women do not have a penis they experience castration anxiety.
I had a divergent view like the most feminist who were in total disagreement to this theory but yet again with time ,I actually felt that this theory had a symbolic truth to it . For instance ,in African context ,when boys turn it to men,they are given more freedom but when girls reach adulthood they are still treated as children are still deemed very vulnerable and more so because of the vertue that they are women.
Also if you consider many religious books, they deem women as surbodinate.They are the ones , who are meant to be submissive, they are not allowed to speak up in some religious affiliation, they are not allowed to make decisions and in some religious circle ,they deem menstrual cycle as something defiling .
The fact that women still struggle in some communities to have their voice heard ,is an evidence that penis envy exist .In barazas women are not allowed to attend and if they do ,their role is just to spectate.
Going by the fact that women will put their lifes on hold when they are pregnant for nine months,while men will go out there and continue their life ,like nothing changed is a more reason , to have penis envy .
When it comes to sexual pleasure, it is hard for some women to easily experience orgasm. In one of his lectures about his penis theory , Freud stated ” women become envious of penis at young age , when they realize boys derive more sexual pleasure from their penises than girls do from their own sexual organs “
For a very long time before contraceptive was introduced, women did not even have power over their sexual pleasure because the fear of getting pregnant and the possibility of putting their life on hold is a challenge.Also in many communities and religious affiliation women were to remain virgins till marriage and if you were found guilty of breaking your virginity before it is due time ,which is marriage ,they will shame you ,call you names and even disown you .I know we still have communities and religious group who still belive so.
The penis envy is also evident , when men have the freedom to have more sexual partners and be deemed by society and their clique as honourable, just because he has messed around with a couple of girls but when a woman gets involved with a number of guys even she takes precaution measures, to take care of herself , she will still be perceived as an whore not only by the opposite sex but also by the same gender . Mostly they will shame her by giving her deragotive names such as “mtaro ” in Swahili language , in which ,when you directly translate it means ” terrace ” or sometimes they will call her ” mteremuko” which means a slope in English .Just to be clear am not trying to justify immorality but am just stating the way things are ;but also the word immoral is relative depending on your perception of what is good or bad.
By now ,you might be probably convinced that I want to be a man , but no ,am not really into becoming a man but I would love to have the advantage that men have .